it goes on
Posted on: October 5, 2008
- In: life | stupid rambling
- 3 Comments
im in deep shit rite now. so messed up. somehow when i sat down and rethink back the things that happened for the past few weeks…i can only say two things: life sucks. sucks or not…it goes on…cant wait to get out of this mess. the mess that i got myself into in the first place. no one to blame except for myself. this year’s eid also sucks. coz my cousin was admitted into the hospital,too many problems inside my head,exams,assignments…. life is so much easier if it’s a fairy tale….
p/s: happy hari raya anyway….
a sleepless week
Posted on: September 6, 2008
OMG…i’m dead tired rite now. for the past few days i haven’t had enough sleep. it’s always either 3am or 4am and wake up early in the morning. yesterday i woke up at 8am and my statistic lecture starts at 8.30am. only God knows how screwed i was yesterday. i was running late. i thought of not going to class but i decided to just go anyway. there were others that were a lot more late than i was. and yesterday my schedule was really packed. from 8.30am til 12.30pm…then continued back from 3pm til 7pm…and at night i also got class from 8.30pm til 10pm…after that i stayed at DK’s foyer until 3am trying very hard to complete my assignment. it was really quiet and quite creepy but hey, it’s fasting month duhh. no satans so no ghosts. but i can’t say the same for dogs though. after that i went to the mamak stall, khaleel next to my hostel and ate there at 3am. then i went back. if mom knows this, she’ll probably kill me.huhuhu…nahh, i used to hanged out with my co-workers until midnight playing futsal and so on. she’s okay with it i guess. as long as i promise to behave and take good care of myself of course.
it’s been raining since the afternoon. i’m freezing to death rite now. huhu…my eyes can’t stay open and at any time i’m gonna hit my head on something if i don’t take a nap rite now.
well…happy fasting to all muslims out there. and stop wasting your money buying too many foods. in the end you’re really full and not be able to finish them all. and throw them into the dustbin. that’s wasting my friend. if you’re that little kid somewhere in Africa, you wouldn’t have the guts to throw them. coz you know that you’re gonna need them. starvation is killing them. so while you eat…think about others ok ?
p/s: USM has been appointed as apex university a couple of days ago…hehe..quite a proud student i am…~
i’m an agent of chaos
Posted on: August 23, 2008
- In: movie | stupid rambling
- 6 Comments
p/s : DON’T READ unless you have watched the dark knight…(WARNING !! CONTAIN SPOILERS)
Too bad Heath Ledger’s gone. heard rumors about him getting an oscar nomination for his brilliant final performance as the joker in the dark knight. it’s going to be a posthumous i guess. watched the dark knight twice already and i gotta say it was bloody brilliant. i mean batman begins was awesome but this one is a lot more than awesome. i don’t even know the correct word to describe it. when i first heard that heath ledger was gonna play the joker i honestly don’t think he can do it. at least i thought he couldn’t beat jack nicholson as the joker but i was proven wrong. after seeing the movie… heath as joker is definitely better and way more psychotic. with his clown(btw..i hate clowns) make-up, his slithering tongue and the scar that put a wide smile on his face made me sitting on the edge of my seat every time he spoke. it was the way he spoke, walk and act that terrorizes the people of Gotham. the joker doesn’t want money. he simply just wanna watch the world burns. he was trying to prove that even the best of man, the most noble can fall into the darkest part of themselves. and he did it..with harvey dent at least, otherwise known as two-faces played by aaron eckhart. at first he was this shining-white-knight of gotham and was considered by bruce wayne as his replacement. batman believes that Gotham needs a hero with a face like harvey dent, an enthusiastic DA. but in the end everything was for nothing bcoz the joker managed to bring the worst out of harvey(watch the movie and you’ll know why).
the dark knight wasn’t just any comic-superhero movie. it was more than that. it wasn’t as emotional as spiderman but still it’s considered as the blockbuster movie of the year. it made people think. batman or harvey dent ? citizens of Gotham blamed batman for the numerous deaths of policemen and innocent people. they called him a vigilante. the joker on the other hand is the villain of course. he’s smart and cruel. his actions are designed to pose moral dilemmas for his enemies esp batman. the entire moral foundation of the batman legend is threatened. if you watched the movie…the two ferries at the end of the movie is a damn good example. there are however similarities between bruce wayne and the joker. both have a twisted childhood. bruce compensated them by doing goods and the joker by doing evil. maybe that part of their lives made them instinctively understand that themselves. the movie did deeply affect people.
in the hospital when the joker visited harvey he delivered a line that i think is the most memorable…”i’m an agent of chaos.” and there’s no doubt about that. poor batman had to take the fall for harvey’s and other people’s death in the end. but i love what Lt. jim gordon said at the end of the movie. i can’t remember though coz it was quite long. i do remember some “…because he’s a silent guardian, a watchful protector, and a dark knight.”
p/s : love the movie and christian bale was as amazing as heath was….=p
soaked handphone and me
Posted on: August 16, 2008
what happened ? haha…well this has been the most unlucky week for me. evry little thing i did turns out to be a complete disaster. my cellphone is one of the victims. huhh, to make it short i accidentally dropped my cell and it went down the toilet. i did nothing but stared at it. i was stunned of course, didn’t know what to do. then i decided to reached down the toilet for my cellphone. what other choice do i have ?? leave it there ? for God’s sake it’s N73 music edition and i really loved it. then i washed it. took out the sim card memory card and the battery. then i walked out of the toilet with my face as calm as possible and blur of course. i wasn’t worried at the time. why ? i have no idea. for 5 days i have to live without my cellphone and it’s a real pain in the neck. i missed my project meeting. evryone kept asking me what’s wrong with my phone. it was really really annoying.
it wasn’t just my cell that got wet this week. me also. with the navy of course. square bashing. yesterday, friday evening it was. only 7 out of 28 new cadets were present. well, most of them went home already since it’s mid-sem break. this 7 cadets including me went through one hell of a day. i was the CL(class leader) yesterday and i received the most unbearable punishment of all just because my senior wanted to see how far i have prepared myself mentally and physically. What the hell ? it wasn’t fair. i’m a lady. i was the only one that had to do push ups, jumping jet, star jump, squad jump 20times alone in front of them. then he asked me all sorts of questions regarding the navy. most of what he asked i could answer but he also asked things that were not in the notes they gave us. i have scars on both my knuckles now. they told us to hold our push up position. when people do push ups they use their palm to hold their body against the surface. from palm we were told to change to knuckles.and it was tar road. haha. i feared this one. i changed one by one. i could only last for 1 or 2 minutes only. my hand was shaking and my knuckles hurt sooo much. when i stood up i could see the flesh in my hand. bright red but not too much blood. how the hell am i gonna do push up with my knuckles on tar road ?? i don’t think i can. after all the punishments we were led to the monkey rack. my hands might be strong but not enough for the monkey rack. hence, i fell into the green-coloured water and it smelled like shit. then they told us to just sit in the water. haha.. i think there was a fish caught in my shoes. i was soaked. and damn tired. but it was fun except for the punishments. i think being in the navy, i don’t have to worry about getting fat…
p/s : going home today…nite at 11pm…can’t wait..huhu
square bashing
Posted on: August 4, 2008
Gladly, i passed my final board. When we were still at KD Sri Pinang, they already did measurements on Delta uniform(the blue one). This upcoming Saturday, they need us to go and see the tailors so that they can measure for our Bravo uniform(the white one). Have to pay for this one. And they’re asking quite an amount of money. I didn’t apply for PTPTN. YPJ hasn’t yet inform whether i get the loan or not. And i didn’t apply for JPA’s scholarship because i don’t want any contract with anybody. So right now,i’m depending on the money my dad left me in my account. And wait for my Navy’s allowance since i’m officially a cadet now. Two weeks from now, they’re gonna give us our service number. Starting 4/8 until 4/9….it’s square bashing time. What’s square bashing ? For the entire month we’re gonna have to wear PO’s clothes to classes. Means baju kurung with white sewn scarf for the ladies and white collar shirt with USM’s tie for the guys. I know i’m gonna look absurd but it’s only for a month and i’m gonna have to live with that. Also for the entire month, every evening there’s gonna be EA(evening activity)…huhuuhu…everyday from 5-7PM. Damn. i’m gonna be dead tired. Then again, it was my choice to join the navy. Like sarah said, we’re gonna need some sacrifice for our futures. BTW, i had a real good time while at KD for the final interview. met some new friends from USM’s Transkerian. Helped my seniors cooked !! haha, they shouldn’t have called me to lend them a helping hand for i am a complete disaster when it comes to the kitchen. hehe…it was really sweet though..beginning to love evrybody in the navy especially my intake members.
p/s : have to finish my paperwork by tomorrow..so sleepy…
- In: books | stupid rambling
- 2 Comments
my weekend was full with seminars, talks, and forums. on saturday morning we were given a talk on communication & its importance. the guy who delivered the talk was a dr. at the university. it was interesting though. the guy practiced good communication. he knows how to connect with his audiences. guess that’s why he was the one that delivered the talk in the first place huh ? later that evening….was program ‘motivasi santai’ with Dr. Fazley Yaacob, the famous Malaysian pop star whom should i say is really brilliant not just in the entertainment industry but also in businesses and studies. the guy’s well-educated and smart. he was a bit darker than i expected(his skin) but macho enough for the girls to drool over the guy. haha..he asked a lot of questions and he definitely likes to walk towards the audience and handed the mic to whoever he wants. that freaked me out since i was sitting on the far end. when he asked,i mean after he asked, he would stare at the particular students waiting for her to respond. how could you answer when you got one damn macho guy staring down at your face ? gulp. hahaha…at the end of his seminar he sang a song. and all of a sudden out of nowhere the girls stood next to him and started taking pictures. poor dr. fazley. haha.
yesterday i went to queensbay mall for the book fest held by USM there. went to Borders hoping that twilight is there. and i got my wish. long have i searched for that book Twilight by Stephenie Meyer. Imagine reading New Moon and Eclipse without reading Twilight ? still understandable but of course i wanna know how Edward and Bella first met. by the way, i love the covers of the three books. somehow they seem unique. the combination between black and red…love them. i rushed back to campus because i had a forum that evening(why in the name of heaven did i signed up for the forum in the first place ??). it was a forum regarding teenager’s behavior. the good and the bad. ‘remaja tergoda, maruah ternoda’. interesting huh ? to my surprise i didn’t fall asleep. hehe…there are a lot of things going on in the university that i don’t know of. when i go here, there’s always something else over there. when i go there, there’s always something going on over here. so how ? have to choose…huhuhu…too bad.
p/s : does the mass media play a vital role in the malaysian politics ??
sick*tired*sore*happy?*blur
Posted on: July 24, 2008
every time i come to new place i’ll get sick. i mean really sick. it’s a 4 in 1 package. fever,flu,cough,and sore throat….i’ve been like this for the past 5 days. with my palapes training (which i can say almost everyday) and my classes, my entire body is aching in pain. on monday evening we had PT (physical training)..bumping, seat ups, jumping jet and the list goes on. with me sick i felt like i was gonna black out after the training. then the next day they called us down again. i had economy lecture from 3-5pm, so i was rushing from my school towards the field for a taekwondo lesson. can u believe it ? me kicking my feet into the air as high as possible ? i’ll tell ya…it ain’t that easy. then later that nite i got anthropology & sociology lecture from 8-10pm. on wednesday i had to wake up at 4.30am and be at the marching field by 6am for morning inspection. huhu…today, this evening PT again at 5pm…and before that…from 3-5pm i have political science lecture (im a bit blur in this class). after the final board and after getting my service number (hopefully i won’t get kick out), my saturdays will be taken for about 10 hours for training at the navy’s HQ. will i make it out of this alive ?? i have no idea….but i know one thing for sure. i want this. badly.
p/s: assignments are piling up like mountains already.
USM, Pulau Pinang..
Posted on: July 5, 2008
the place where i’m studying rite now. i’m taking social science here in USM. i can’t believe i’m here at this particular moment and finally getting the chance to further my studies in the field that i really like. when i enter my 2nd semester, i am planning to major in anthropology & sociology an minor in archeology. dream come true ?? nahh…still heve one semester to go through.
last saturda was the day i set foot in p.pinang and USM. i’m in the best university in malaysia ! i got accepted into the school of social science which is the best in malaysia and probably throughout southeast asia. orientation week is over. as usual it was really tiring but definitely fun and enjoying. i applied for PALAPES Tentera Laut otherwise known as USM’s Navy ROTU (Reserve Officer Training Unit). i passed the fitness test which was really though but i think i did really well. then i was called up for an interview session with one of the Navy Lieutenant which was conducted in english (the navy is really strict about english). and gladly i passed. next week ,i have to do a medical check up at USM Medical Centre. then i’ll have to go to another interview with high ranking officers at KD Sri Pinang,Navy’s Headquarter….man..it’s gonna be tough.but i want this badly. we’ll see how i’ll do.
class starts this tuesday !! looking forward to it.
p/s : wish me luck for the interview !!
- In: life | personal
- 6 Comments
i have a story. there’s nothing special about this one. it’s just a story and i’m sure the things that happened in this story is common to your eyes. we see it happens every day. if only you are looking. it’s about a girl. a daughter of a happily married couple. she has everything she ever wanted. a father, a mother, a sister, love, a happy family, money, and practically everything anyone could ever asked for. then she left home for college. she had a real good time in college. made lots of friends and her pointer was good. after a year, she went back home. at first everything was just like the way she left them a year ago. after a couple of weeks she started noticing that something was wrong in her family. her father came home late from work. being a good daughter she was, she thought her father went to hang out with his friends. then things started to seem ugly. sometimes he did it three times in a week. she became suspicious. her father and mother often engaged in a fight with one another. but it wasn’t that kind of fight. they just talked but their expressions,their way of talking and their gestures somehow revealed their true feelings.
one day she decided to check her father’s cellphone. she did and she found a few messages that she herself refused to believe. a woman whom her father save her name with initials send messages talking about money and stuff. that she can’t wait to see him. the daughter was shocked. she cried because she never ever believe that her father would cheat on her mother. after that she acted like evrything was okay. pretended that nothing has happened. there was this one time when the mother,the father, and the daughter went for a shopping trip. all of a sudden the mother confronted the daughter about the father’s behavior. the mother said that she doesn’t trust the father and she knows something is going on with him. she thought that the father is having an affair but she’s not certain. and she’s worried. the daughter just stood there looking stupid and not knowing what to say or what to do. emotions have been drained from her face. so, the daughter said she wouldn’t know anything about it. truth is, she knows something. it was just that she couldn’t tell the mother. because she knows it would break her mother’s heart. the daughter felt like she was betrayed and tormented in the inside. she simply doesn’t know what to do.
while in the car the mother and father fought again. no…they didn’t yell at one another. it was just words. they were being smart with one another. it was more like sarcasm. it went on for a while until they were tired of each other. the daughter was in the back seat. and she heard everything. she cried in silence. tears fell down her cheek and no one noticed. maybe it was because she didn’t make any sound. what will happen to their once happy family ? she doesn’t know. all she could think of was to get away from all those madness. and maybe she will. but the daughter…is definitely broken.
that was it. i don’t know the ending of the story. maybe soon someone will tell me. or maybe i’ll find the ending myself. then again…it’s just a story…..unfortunately, a sad one.
i’m addicted
Posted on: May 17, 2008
well, ever since i got home, watched 4 movies at the cinema already. the first one was over her dead body. the one with eva longoria parker. it’s a romantic comedy. i don’t really watch that kinda movie but it was a request and i didn’t really feel like breaking someone’s heart. thank God it was funny enough to make me laugh my head off. it was worth it.
the second one goes to the forbidden kingdom of course. wouldn’t have miss it, not even for the world. it was one hell of a movie. that’s what you get when you put jet li and jackie chan on the same set. bottom line…i love the movie..
watched ironman. critics said it’s one of the blockbuster movie of the year but i don’t see why. not that it’s not good. it’s a good movie but it’s average. i don’t know what they saw in ironman but i think robert downey jr. did a good job in portraying ironman. by the sound of it, looks like there’s gonna be a sequel…
the 2nd installment of narnia, prince caspian is great. at least it does not disappoint me. since the movie is adapted from C.S. lewis’s franchise, of course some of the facts are inaccurate. like the part about the battle near the castle. if i’m not mistaken there’s no such battle. and the part about summoning the white witch back to life. ah.. bother it. there’s nothing preventing me from liking the movie. i love it !
well, i have an interview next week. dunno when i applied for it. i got the letter a couple of days ago. and guess what ? the interview is in KL. man…why can’t they just do it here in JB. i don’t even know where MARA building is. looks like dad’s gonna have to take a day off from saving people’s life and start saving mine. hehe…anyway..i know nothing about this interview. it’s weird but i’m gonna give it a try…
p/s : wish me luck guys…
wannursyazana..an insight on the life of a traveller on earth 
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